Bang your head slowly

Here we go again.

Nothing betrays the Bush administration's Iraq shell game like the administration itself, "which six months ago issued a series of political goals for the Iraqi government to meet by this month [and] is now tacitly acknowledging that the goals will take significantly longer to achieve."

Well blow me away. Things aren't going according to plan. So what do we do? Why of course. Extend the plan. Which actually means that things are indeed going according to plan, because to work it only requires an extension. Got it?

If not, just bang your head against a sturdy wall until it spins into a circular-thinking mode.

The beauty of the administration's plan is that it's always a sure-fire winner, because success always lies months down the road. How can one possibly oppose the triumph that awaits us just over the next hill? What kind of defeatist attitude is that?

The chief planner knows. It's a shortsighted one buried in "a culture of seeking [that seeks?] instant results."

Now, until you've sufficiently banged your head, you may find that insulting. You're now labeled an attention-disordered child for expecting "instant results" -- presently defined as those coming within a half-decade or so -- although you were praised for being made of stronger, more adult neocon stuff when believing in the fairy-tale instant result of an instantly accomplished mission four years ago.

Hey, chump, we're talking neocolonial imperialism here, and the experts know that Rome didn't disintegrate overnight. It took a good long while to implode, and not one of its expert planners expected or sought instant results in the process.

Wait ... This line of thinking seems to be headed in the wrong direction. Perhaps Rome isn't the best example to pull out of our imperial hat. Here's a better one ...

Uh, they'll get back to you on that.

Look, the important thing is this: The plan that didn't work, isn't working, and has no reasonable expectation of working needs to be extended so that it can work.

After all, they're really just now getting started. Their crack analysts -- no jokes, please, about analysts on crack -- recently determined in a flurry of professional insight that we need to "create the conditions for achieving the objectives."

Now you, of childish and insufficiently banged mind, wouldn't have thought of that. They did. And that's why they hold the exalted reins of power, and you don't.

OK, step two. (They're very methodical.) The aforementioned conditions will -- not should, will -- "be fully in place [by] June." After that, we coast, because "all of the objectives" will then "be fulfilled [by] year’s end."

See? What's to worry? Not a thing, as long as you hug that wall and start slowly but forcefully banging your head.

Comments

[Scarlett]

They aren't lying when they say their plan is working. The plan was never to liberate Iraq. The plan was to turn Iraq into a home for permanent military bases from which to launch (or threaten to launch) pre-emptive wars against any middle east countries that aren't willing to play by our rules (i.e., do exactly what we want them to do). The bases also serve another purpose -- to provide protection for the oil pipeline.

While we get distracted over their "incompetence" -- they've gotten exactly what they wanted. They couldn't have stayed without chaos -- is there any surprise that they dismantled the entire infrastructure of the country to facilitate that? That is why there was/is no exit plan. They don't intend to exit. They just need to string us along until they start a war with Iran and we'll forget all about Iraq and the fact that we haven't left yet.

[emkay]

Send cellphones to Bush, Cheny, Rice, et al ... they are certainly deserving of cell phones.

[Vic Anderson]

And hey, we can do the same again in 2008 (unless, of course We IMPEACH the Bushists NOW!)!