Mitt, gone 'round the bend

Just in case you've opened a file--or a vault--for keeping archival track of Mitt Romney's thermonuclear meltdown of a presidential campaign, the Guardian has an agreeably efficient summary of his "blunders [and] clangers" in London alone. Merely one stopover--easiest thing in the world, right?--just flash some nice smiles and say nice things and be nice to one's host and then get one's ass the hell on the aircraft and be gone.

A child could do it. A child could do it. Mitt Romney can't. He's been rude, awkward, embarrassingly ill-prepared for meetings and inexplicably logorrheic in interviews.

When one's host country, Mitt, using you as a yardstick, begins to fondly remember Sarah Palin as the Grace Kelly of conservative American politics, then you know you've set an unbeatable record in the Olympic competition of Dumb.

How could this happen? How could this be? Mitt was once a cosmopolitan man, a man of the world, a French-speaking high financier of global complexities and delicate international relations. Now? He's dumber than Palin. I ask again: What happened?

I have theory.

I recall watching a movie years ago in which the handsome, debonair Stuart Whitman played a journalist who decides to investigate the dark mysteries of a spooky insane asylum by getting himself committed as a patient. He would, from the inside, ferret out the internal workings of this wickedly incomprehensible hellhole ... well, you can guess from that intro the outcome. It ended with Whitman going as genuinely mad as the other inmates.

And from that, you have of course guessed the analogy.

At some precise point Mitt Romney decided to enter the wacky, unbalanced, bug-eyed thunderdome of far-right fanaticism so that he could schmooze with the inmates; go native; become One with the Lunacy; be accepted. And that, alas, was his last quasi-rational act of free will. He has been assimilated; his brain, his personality, his very Mittness have been pulverized into the right's primitive state of nature of the savagely inept and clinically creepy. 

And now he's beyond help. We tried. We extended a hand, we threw him a rope, we warned him of the dangers of brains on pseudoconservatism. He didn't listen. And now? Well, there he is--not in London, no, not really--he's with Leonardo DiCaprio and Sarah Palin, on Shutter Island.

Comments

[japa21]

I have heard some theories that Mitt went to London to do exactly what he did. This will fire up the folks over there to show even more support for Obama, which solidifies the meme that Obama is "other", leans toward the European style (socialism) and is un-American.

I said to myself, "Self, that is really an idiotic theory. Only a crazy erson woudl do soemthing like that."

Then I realized just who Romney is trying to keep on his side. From there the thinking pretty much followed what you wrote.

The sad part is, it will work with a lot of Americans.

[melsouza]

PM., I have a different take on this. This would have happened with or without Romney's catapult to the extreme right. His critique of the London Olympics reflects the way he looks at the world--through the eyes of a businessman: expediency, results, zero-sum mathematical solutions to problems. Put the dog on the roof. Get more security on the streets. Etc. His critique was not that of a politician-diplomat representing his country on an overseas trip--it was that of businessman analyzing a problem in a board meeting. This is the real Romney--apolitical, unemotional, greedy, immediate-results--oriented. These stumbles don't surprise me at all-actually I've expected them for quite some time. I've been arguing on the blogosphere, with friends, etc. that this man is not a politician, he doesn't understand politics, and is a hopeless, irrevocable clutz. This is just the beginning. He's in for a bumpy ride.

[You Don't Say]

I have a simpler theory: Mitt has the money but not the talent.

He's a terrible politician trying to buy his way into the White House.

[Janicket]

Further to melsouza's point: Romney's lived in a bubble of privilege all his life, never having to swallow the disappointments and petty humiliations most of us do, never having had to learn to guard his tongue and play nice with superiors. From governor's son in private schools to a business career whose path was smoothed for him by connections, wealth, and instant CEO-hood, he's always been a top dog and hasn't had to develop the instinctive diplomacy most people learn as a matter of survival.

And it shows. Hoo boy, does it ever show.

[Kenny]

"Be careful what you pretend to be because you are what you pretend to be." -Kurt Vonnegut

[SueMe]

One thing this kerfaffle has caused is a good look at Romney's management of the 2000 winter olympics in SLC. Seems he took quite a lot of federal money and a good amount of that went into the pockets of wealthy business men in the area. Does this surprise anyone?

[SueMe]

Oops....make that the 2002 winter olympics!

[Peter G]

Well I'm probably not the only person here who read a certain book by William Golding. Behold Mitt Romney: Lord of the Files. He's got the damn conch but does not know what to do with it. I'd cast Obama as the Monster in the Jungle.

[Janicket]

And Der Spiegel weighs in on Romney's embarrassments (English language edition):

http://www.spiegel.de/international/world/mitt-romney-stumbles-during-campaign-trip-to-london-a-846722.html

I daresay the Germans are rather glad Mr. Mitt won't be blessing them with his presence on this trip.

[majii]

I think Romney has always had an inflated sense of self. I recall reading that before he assumed control of Bain, he had it written into his contract that he would accept no responsibility if he failed during his tenure at Bain. He also doesn't seem to realize that running a government is not like running a business. In a business the CEO can order employees to do his bidding and have them do exactly what he has ordered, but a POTUS has to deal with a very large number of individuals in Congress over whom he has little control. John Boehner learned this the hard way when he stacked the House with Tea Party politicians who feel they need to neither respect him nor take orders from him.